Wednesday, March 12, 2014

a room to call our own {thankful}


we bought this house almost a year ago and moved in when wilder was just 5.5 weeks old. on mother's day, we packed up the last of the clothes, and then wilder and i went off to stay at grandma and grandpa's, while the movers moved all our boxes into the garage, because the wood floors weren't done drying. i was overwhelmed by all the work it needed (and still needs). on top of adjusting to sleeplessness and the constant needs of a (sleep-resistant) newborn, being relegated to the (far) suburbs, not very close to anything i'd like to be close to, and renovating and decorating (not to mention unpacking) a house were far from how i pictured spending the first few months of motherhood.

slowly, we stripped wallpaper, painted, unpacked, organized (some things), and assembled and moved furniture around. it was definitely not all fun. but now, every morning when i bring wilder downstairs and we plop down on the floor to play, i feel so thankful for this house. our life is not very glamorous or exciting. it is routine and monotonous, even. we spend our weekends doing housework (and painting things like kitchen cabinets), grocery shopping, cooking. we spend our weekdays sitting inside far too much, having the same conversations (where is wilder? peekaboo!//where's the purple ring?//do you want to read a book?//mama has to fold some diapers...), eating at the same times in the same's so normal and boring. but i love it. i finally feel like i can relax. i finally feel like i'm living, instead of barreling from one moment to the next, propelled by a stressed-out shell of myself.

it's not like i'm stress-free or happy all the time. au contraire. but i'm thankful for this living room. after all our painting and decorating, it feels like a home (well, only this one room does). it's not much. we've got a long ways to go, but it's also so, so much.

and look at that tiny little boy! (just a few months ago he was a tiny little baby.) on monday he waved bye-bye to papa for the first time! every morning i am so thankful that i get to spend these days with him. they are passing much too quickly—i could cry they are going so fast.

gravitating towards my lap these days.
and toward the camera, always.

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