Wednesday, February 17, 2016

a january list.

Blog - January list

i, like most of the rest of the world, do something at the beginning of every year. i make a list. a note to self. a journal entry. an essay. it's not exactly new year's resolutions...ok, yes, that basically is what it is. but i call it a january list.

what i love about this list at the beginning of every year is how it feels like a blank slate, like a possibility. like i haven't rewritten this exact list nearly every year since i realized college was over (which took a really long time, because i kept going back to school). the other thing i like is when i read back over this list, later in the year or years later, and realize how many of those things i actually did. i think it's a little because when you write it down, you make an intention for your year, and even if you don't refer back to the list or even think about it consciously at all, somewhere your subconscious has kept track of that intention. basically, more things get done if you put them into a list. which is what i'm always telling j. but ANYways. ;)

i realize it's february, so this is kind of not relevant (or is it!), but i've been thinking lately about the list i made in january. i also think a lot about an article like this article (not this exact article, but i can't find the exact article so this article has to do) that i read a year or so ago. it's about the theory that you only have 4 burners (the burners being your capacity/time you have to give to things), and that if you want to be "successful" you have to turn off or down one of your burners. you can't successfully do 4 things at one time, the theory goes. well, i don't really care all that much about the rules and theories of it, but i do think it's an interesting idea. and it kind of helps me put into perspective why dinnertime (or Lars) might be super neglected or why i'm not actually writing anything — because i have too many burners going. so, this idea is a hard one to combine with my january list because a january list has more than three things on it. at least mine does, because i get kind of excited (over-ambitious) about january lists so i tend to make them long.

after i make my list, i usually circle a few that are the most important. because obviously "eat more veggies" is just not on par with "write another novel." a lot of the things i write down are more like wishes or hopes. i don't intend to beat myself up about them, but if they could just sort of happen that would be great. (ha! wouldn't all of life?)

my big three (4? 5?) (wishes? hopes? goals?) for this year are:

1. read the Bible and the ministry am and pm.
(this is always at the top of my lists. it's also always the hardest one.)

2. write another novel

3. be present with my kids and
(4.) take weekly photos of them
(and (5.) blog said photos)
(yes, this list is getting really screwy. i'm starting to see why i maybe don't get more done.)

in-between the lines of these "resolutions" are a few things on my list which are also implied in the success of these, like "continue not watching tv (except downton abbey)." tv-watching and (let's be honest) book-reading are my number 1 and 2 enemies to the big three. mostly because it's hard to do them in moderation. like, i find it hard to go to bed when i'm in the middle of a good book. i blame that on my mother, who did, upon one occasion at least, stay up all night reading a book to us. i love that about her so much. may i be the same way, even if it interferes with my "list."

i'm not entirely sure if or when i'll get to number 2 (hopefully before nanowrimo is all i ask). that is currently making me a little crazy. in the past, the only way has been to get up at a horribly dark hour of morning (night in my opinion). and i'm gearing up for that, but it really takes some gearing up and some desperation. i am soooo not a morning person.

i'm also not being very consistent with number 1, so feel free to encourage me in that direction. ;)

basically what i'm saying to you is that it's been almost two months and all i've done with it is take some photos of my kids. and i don't even have a great dinner-making or dog-walking record for the past two months to blame! all i have is the excuses of sickness, restarting this blog, and the daily mundanity. somehow (i'm still trying to figure out how), those things take up way more time than i plan. obviously this is not a how-to article and clearly you will not be coming to me about how to be more productive with your life.

do you have a january list? or a big three? if so, i'd love to hear them!

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